“I think I should hook up the mower and mow ditches while it’s cool this morning.

I wonder if I’ll need to oil the pto to get it to slide on.

Nope, slid right on. 

Hey.  There’s the fourwheeler and that reminds me I was going to run back out to see if that new calf has bedded down.  Maybe I can catch it while its mom is away and get it tagged.

I really hope its mom is quite a ways away.  She seemed so possessive earlier.

Hey.  There’s the mom and the calf isn’t with her.  Okay, now to find it.

Looks like mom and the rest are at least 300 feet away from where I last saw that calf, but with this tall grass . . .

C’mon, c’mon, where are you, little guy?

Guess I’ll start driving a gridwork to find it.  Hopefully, I don’t run over it in the process.

Ah.  There you are.

Oops.  I see you are on to my game.  Stop looking at me that way.

Here.  I’ll leave the fourwheeler running.  Maybe that will distract you.

Okay.  Get the eartag and the applicator. 

Maybe if I walk around on to its back, I can sneak up on it. 

Nope.  You rascal, turn the other way. 

I’m going to have to make a flying dive/leap/run on this deal.

Ready, here goes.

Wham!  I got you, you little freak.

Oh no you don’t.  Don’t even think you’ll get away.

Quick.  Get on top of it. 

Crazy thing is stronger than on ox.  How’d it wriggle out from under me?

Hey!  It’s getting away!  Grab the hind legs.  There, that’s better.  Can’t pull my 200 pounds around so easily when I’m laying full out on the ground can you. 

Great.  There’s a sticker plant right here.  No matter.  Get moving.  I hear the mama’s making a ruckus. 

Better sneak a peek to see how close they are.  Can’t be too close yet.  They have that water to cross, and it’s deep, and then a good 300 feet.

Oh for the love of Mike!  They are barreling towards me!

Cripes!  Get that eartag in and get out of here. 

Hey.  Where’s the eartag? 

There it is, under that sticker plant.  Now where’s the applicator? WHERE’S THE APPLICATOR? 

This calf is leaving again.  Get your knee on its side.  There, that’s better.  That’ll hold it.

WHERE’S THE APPLICATOR?

Hooboy, there it is.  Quick, is this calf a bull or heifer?

Lift its tail and see. 

I can’t see, and the mom is right behind me now!

Just call it a bull and run!

Okay, tag in the right ear for bull. 

Get off and away, man, and run for it.

Woah.  That was close.

Okay, for the record, I don’t know if 2110 is a bull or heifer; it’s tagged bull for those who need to know.”